When looking at Myers-Briggs personality types, INFJs are creative, passionate, principled, and altruistic. But what do they look for, and how do they behave in relationships? Let’s explore more about INFJ compatibility for relationships and dating.
About INFJ personality type
Learning about INFJs in relationships includes knowing foundational knowledge about them as individuals. INFJs are rare, and their dating preferences vary more than is typical for other MBTIs. However, they love being in committed relationships and make excellent long-term partners.
INFJs are semi-social introverts in that they will gladly accept an invitation to go to a party, but they will be most comfortable on the outskirts. However, their dynamic personalities draw people to them, and they find it easy to make friends when they want to. They love to develop friendships with genuine, well-intentioned people who will inspire them to improve and grow.
When it comes to working on projects, INFJs will stay focused until they are completed to perfection. When INFJs have free time, they like to spend it doing creative projects in their own company. Things like cooking, baking, gardening, art, music, reading, and writing are often hobbies enjoyed by INFJs.
In their careers, INFJs fit in well in several industries. Their driving force of motivation is their core values, and they typically gravitate to roles with a high humanitarian payout over a career with wealth and fame as the biggest reward. They like to come home from work knowing they’ve helped someone or made a difference in the world.
What an INFJ wants from a relationship?
INFJs are very particular when it comes to both romantic and platonic relationships. They are friendly, empathetic, likable, and charming, which draws people to them. However, they are also perfectionistic, serious, and patient and will wait for their perfect person to come into their lives.
The particular nature of INFJs will work in their favor in the long run. They prefer to be in long-term relationships, and having a long list of requirements means they have a higher chance of having a successful long-term relationship with their chosen partners. In addition, because INFJs are “feeling” personalities, they are not shallow and will be drawn to qualities like kindness, honesty, being growth-oriented, and having compassion.
The most important thing to INFJs is their core values. Any potential partner they are getting to know will need to share their views on those topics because INFJs are unwilling to budge and defend their values fiercely. A partner who shares their values and is willing to take on altruistic and humanitarian projects with them will easily win their hearts.
INFJs in a relationship
Once an INFJ decides a person is suitable for a relationship with them, they make devoted partners. They take their relationships seriously and will not take their partners for granted. INFJs will work hard to foster growth and connection in their relationships.
INFJs have a lot of passion for the things they care about in their lives, and their partners are no exception. They love expressing their love physically, and having a deep emotional connection with their partner enhances the ways they behave intimately with their partners. As a result, anyone in a relationship with an INFJ will not be left wondering how their partner feels about them.
Having a genuine relationship and connection is something that INFJs desire above all else. They value their integrity, and having open and honest communication with an INFJ is a great way to show your love and respect for them. They are incredibly insightful, and telling white lies to an INFJ will not be the road to success.
Strengths as a partner
Knowing that not just anyone is good enough for an INFJ means that they won’t enter into a relationship they don’t see as having potential. If you are in a relationship with an INFJ, you can feel assured that they are with you because they like you and they want to be with you. Not for any other shallow or disingenuous reason.
INFJs will always do what they think is right in any given situation, and they hate doing anything that causes hurt or harm to another person. Therefore, they are not going to be likely to lie or act dishonestly within a relationship. They will also be happy to contribute their insightful, honest opinion to anything their partner needs it for.
One of the most prominent markers of an INFJ is their capacity for empathy. They make and build connections quickly based on an understanding of someone’s inner emotions and feelings. As a result, they handle their own emotions and the emotional needs of others very well and can work through most conflicts without too much challenge.
When you are in a relationship with an INFJ, their warm personality will brighten your day. INFJs are gracious, kind, excellent listeners, humble, and focused on the comfort and feelings of others. They give openly but are also not pushovers or people who will be taken advantage of, which will result beneficially for everyone in a relationship.
Difficulties of INFJs in relationships
INFJs are very sensitive to criticism, especially when the criticism is directed at one of their core principles or values. They view these values as the morally or ethically “right” way of things and will get very upset and defensive if that idea is challenged.
Idealists at heart, INFJs are unsatisfied with anything less than perfect. In a relationship, it can leave their partners feeling like nothing is ever good enough. It can also lead to burnout for the INFJ that works so hard to get everything just right.
While independence in itself is not a negative trait, INFJs can be so private and independent that they don’t ask for help when they need it. Their perfectionism and hard-working nature feed into this need to problem-solve on their own. Unfortunately, it can make them appear mistrustful or distant in a relationship by not sharing their vulnerability and challenges.
Again, working hard to achieve goals is not a bad thing in itself, and it is one of the features that makes INFJs who they are. Not only do they use their creative minds to dream up ideas and goals to work towards, but they take action to achieve those goals. They will stay hyper-focused on those goals and will sometimes need to be reminded about their other responsibilities (like eating or sleeping) by their loved ones.
INFJ Compatibility for Relationships and Dating
The complexity, versatility, and rarity of INFJs make it difficult to pinpoint exact characteristics that are sure-fire wins for compatibility in relationships. However, They will generally be the most successful with other personality types that enjoy long-term relationships, are passionate about their goals, and are genuinely kind and compassionate. On the other hand, they will need to work the hardest to find success and compatibility with personality types that tend to be more argumentative, critical, or flakey.
The best matches for INFJ’s are:
INFJs and ENFJs balance each other out very well. The social, fun-loving nature of ENFJs helps break the focus of an INFJ getting close to burnout. ENFJs also typically share an altruistic nature and passion for working towards growth and improvement with INFJs.
It turns out opposites attract when it comes to INFJs and ENTPs. The charming, quick-witted nature of ENTPs will draw INFJs to them, especially if they share the same interests. Different perspectives, approaches, and organizational habits aside, these two are both creative, flexible thinkers and will balance each other while working to achieve the same goals.
INFPs are the creative daydreamers in our lives, and when in a relationship with an INFJ, they work well together to bounce ideas back and forth. Their spontaneity will balance out the INFJs tendency to adhere to a rigid structure. In addition, both personality types have a lot of kindness, empathy, compassion, altruism, and emotional intelligence that can help contribute to a compatible match.
INFJs and INTPs share a love of growth and forward momentum, goal achieving, and structure. Even though INTPs can be a little bit blunt and use logical thinking and practicality over emotional thinking and empathy, INFJs and INTPs can work well together. Both are great at working through conflicts, so any hiccups can be quickly resolved.
INFJs are rare, complex, and flexible. They take their relationships seriously and don’t take their partners for granted. INFJ’s ability to plan, focus on, and achieve goals explains their approach to dating, and despite the rigid outward appearance of this method, they are extremely devoted and loving.
INFJs are few and far between, but it will be well worth it if you get the opportunity to get to know one – even more so if they see potential in you for a romantic relationship and dating.