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11 Facts About ENFJ vs INFJ Relationship Compatibility for Male & Female

People with ENFJ and INFJ Myers-Briggs Type Indicators are similar, but there are key differences that affect how they absorb information and interact with the outside world that set them apart. ENFJs view things through experience and with an outward perspective, while INFJs look inwards to process the world around them. On the surface, ENFJ vs INFJ compatibility seems like a given, but do their differences create balance or conflict?

ENFJ and INFJ Relationship Compatibility for a Male and Female


According to the Myers-Briggs Foundation, people with ENFJ type indicators are “warm, empathetic, responsive and responsible.” They are very aware of the feelings and needs of others and have a good understanding of what drives them. They see each person’s potential and desire to help others grow. They are steadfastly faithful, and receptive to both acclaim and critique. ENFJs are highly social and often find themselves in positions of group leadership.

INFJs try to gain an understanding of the world through the connection in concepts, interactions, and personal possessions. They look inward and are insightful when deciphering the rationales of those around them. They are attentive and steadfast in their core values while developing clear ideas about how to best support their causes and communities and are resolute in the execution of their plans.

Generally speaking, the two personality types are very similar. But ENFJ vs INFJ difference is rooted in the way they process information. ENFJs are extroverted and process the world based on experiences and looking outside themselves. INFJs first try to comprehend the outside world from a “thoughtful, introspective place”.

11 Facts About ENFJ and INFJ Relationship Compatibility

Here are 11 facts that show how these two types might be successful, or unsuccessful in a relationship:

#1 First Impressions

When an ENFJ personality meets someone new, they are eager to enter into a deep, profound conversation right away. Their outgoing tendencies and fervor for social connection will have them diving right in.

Contrasting to that method is the INFJ personality. While they seek connection in ideas, they have a predisposition to a more reserved approach when first meeting someone new.

Regarding compatibility when first meeting, ENFJ and INFJ pairs can be successful as long as there is equilibrium between the eager energy of the ENFJ and the social reservation of the INFJ.

#2 Trust in the Relationship

One of the most important predictors of long-term success in a relationship is trust. ENFJs take dating and relationships seriously, and typically don’t view romantic relationships casually. They also don’t like to let people down. ENFJs can generally be very trusted in a serious relationship.

INFJs are also very trustworthy in relationships. They tend to have strong convictions about what is right and wrong, and their actions are driven by the effect they may have on others.

Unmistakably, pairing two trustworthy, loyal personality types would lend itself well to a successful romantic match.

#3 Intimacy

According to Adler and Proctor II in their book “Looking out, Looking In”, there are four avenues through which we feel connected with our partners: Physical intimacy, emotional intimacy, intellectual intimacy, and intimacy through shared activities.

ENFJs and INFJs both have traits that can lead to growth in all four categories. Both have a strong interest in others, good intuition, and empathetic nature help them develop physical, and emotional intimacy easily. Both would understand the important issues and needs of the other and would be able to build connections through that understanding.

Intellectually, ENFJs and INFJs are well matched and prefer deep, meaningful conversations. Both types are skilled communicators and would effortlessly build a solid intellectual connection. Finally, as people who tend to have inclinations for altruism and helping others, they would have similar taste in activities to share with their partners.

In terms of relationship compatibility, ENFJs and INFJs would be focused on one another and would undoubtedly have the opportunity to develop a close, intimate connection.

#4 Disputes and Conflict Resolution

People with ENFJ indicators have a desire to avoid conflicts. They may even avoid disagreements at the expense of their own principles, which can lead to long-term problems and resentment in a relationship. However, they also tend to develop deep connections and can empathize with their significant other. Giving them the ability to see their partner’s perspective of the situation and resolve conflicts quickly.

INFJ types also have a strong desire for peace and agreement in a relationship. They recognize patterns, see the “big-picture” and can imagine things from the perspective of others. Should a conflict arise in a relationship, an INFJ has the tools needed to resolve it quickly.

Overall, both personality types desire tranquility and peace, and have the ability to empathize, and resolve any conflicts they may have with their partner. If they communicate effectively, when it comes to disagreements, ENFJ vs INFJ is very compatible.

#5 Conversations

ENFJs are charismatic, energetic leaders and can unknowingly dominate a conversation. However, if they know when it’s time to let others have the floor, they are excellent conversationalists.

INFJs, on the other hand, are good listeners, and often find it relaxing to let the other person drive the conversation.

If the ENFJ knows when a conversation has turned into a speech and lets their partner have a turn, these two would have the potential for great conversations.

#6 Core Values

ENFJ and INFJ both have a strong adherence to their values, and when those values don’t match up is where a relationship could fail.

Neither will falter from their core values and while they might be willing to learn about outside perspectives on an issue, they do not like to be convinced to follow another form of thought themselves.

By now, it should be evident that these personality types are a compatible match. Unfortunately, the core values of the individual could be the point where the relationship becomes incompatible.

#7 Humanitarian Efforts

Circling back to the point on intimacy gained through shared activities, ENFJ and INFJ couples would find connection and compatibility in humanitarian efforts.

Both personality types thrive in endeavors of altruism and have the drive to do good in their community (local or global).

They are mutually passionate about helping others, and they would find a connection in serving their society through volunteering or charitable efforts.

#8 Handling Stress

Regrettably, life sometimes throws a wrench in things, and ENFJs tend to focus inward when they are stressed. They become critical of themselves and others and will put a lot of effort into problem-solving (even if there is no problem to solve). When stressed, an ENFJ would benefit from activities like problem-solving strategy games or working with computers.

When stressed, an INFJ reacts outwardly and is likely to spoil themselves with physical stimulus like eating, drinking, and shopping. They may also become very irritable with others. They would benefit from activities that filter their sensory needs in a healthy way by doing solitary physical activities like hiking or yoga or focus on creative outlets like baking or crafts.

In any couple, the way each partner handles stress can have an effect on the other. As empathetic, perceptive types, an ENFJ and INFJ couple has the ability to know when their partner needs space to function through their stress appropriately, making them a compatible match.  

#9 Fighting for What is “Right”

Both ENFJs and INFJs have a strong moral compass and will steadfastly adhere and advocate for what they feel is “right”

However, this could have a negative impact on their relationship compatibility when what each perceives as “right” differs. For example, one might feel that oil pipelines can create jobs, and increase economic revenues, where the other might feel like the disruption of protected lands when a pipeline is built is not worth the potential benefits.

When it comes to what is “right” in the opinion of ENFJ vs INFJ, there is potential for relationship dealbreakers to get in the way of an otherwise good match. However, if their views on what is right aligned, their partnership would work well together to campaign for those causes.

#10 Energy and Rest

When an ENFJ has spent their energy reserves, as an extrovert, they will be reinvigorated by surrounding themselves with people in a social atmosphere.

Quite the opposite, the introverted INFJ will require a quiet, relaxing space to be alone. They replenish their energy reserves best with solitary activities like reading.

In the same way that each has the empathy and ability to see when their partner is stressed, they also can see when their partner needs an energy boost and understand how they get that energy back. If they have that understanding of one another, they can balance each other out well.

#11 Bringing the Best Out in One Another

This is one of the most important factors in any relationship – does your partner brings out the best version of you? An ENFJ might push their INFJ partner to be more social or to try new things. This can be positive in a relationship.

Counter to that, an INFJ could slow down their ENFJ partner and get them to focus on themselves, rather than focusing on the needs of everyone around them first.

There is great potential for an ENFJ and INFJ to bring out the best in each other, and to balance each other out very nicely.


It is clear that ENFJ vs INFJ personalities are similar. In some cases, being too similar can be the downfall of a relationship. In the case of an ENFJ and INFJ relationship, the facts are indisputable – they are a great match. While they may have some conflicts, they have the tools needed to resolve them quickly and with understanding and care. There is wonderful potential for balance and success in an ENFJ and INFJ relationship.

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